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Is Your Life Falling Apart?

by Dave Markowitz(more info)

listed in psychospiritual, originally published in issue 266 - November 2020

It’s easy to look around and think that life is falling apart. And for many, it is. And for some, it’s coming together… by falling apart.

Not to minimize people’s very real pain, trauma and struggles, rather, let’s inquire: What is the best possible way of managing what is happening?

I think we all know that what we resists, persists. So, what would happen if we did the opposite it? What if we better understood that our soul wants us to experience all parts of self, and that in a world of contrast as teacher, we have to go through some pretty dark matter to get to the contentment?


falling apart


Meaning, we learn about love by learning its opposite first – ironically after being born as love! We can only appreciate abundance after experiencing its opposite, scarcity. And we learn about oneness by experiencing aloneness. And these are true on both the individual and collective levels!

Once we honor what is currently true – rather than oppose it – we can better allow ourselves to have our feelings about what is happening. By opening up to our emotions, we can get a clearer understanding of the ‘why’ things are happening as they are beyond the level of mind, and how best to respond to "what is". Once we’re through even a fraction of the emotional chaos, we can be filled with clearer guidance of what to do, be, say, and when.

I know what I’m saying is – metaphorically – a tough pill to swallow. But if we keep swallowing physical pills instead of dealing with the real issues, we’re all in for a much bigger shock than what we’re currently experiencing. If we keep trying to “figure it out”, we’re doomed to repeat it.

As many of us have been forced to this new state, allowing ourselves to have the emotions that come with this is paramount for thriving in the new world. Once we face and heal our shadow emotions, we are that much stronger and can walk with less fear on the planet. Whereas most of us were taught to run from fears, the new understanding says to turn and face them. It’s not easy. It can be extremely challenging, and I don’t recommend doing the deepest work on one’s own. And I also know we don’t have to do it all at once – I think that would be terrifying beyond belief. We can chip away at the proverbial stone of these fears and work with them inch by inch (as if they’re tangible and can be measured! You get the point.).

In the last few months, many of us have felt very alone and confused. Some have tried to reason with the sadness of aloneness – not grieving the loss of "what was" – and likely are losing that game. Others are getting pharmaceutical help (and if you need such, do what your doctor says!) for a temporary alleviation of symptoms while the underlying causative energy is still burning up inside. Others are adapting to the new world and finding other ways to connect. And a smaller select few of brave souls are using aloneness as a vehicle for deep transformation!

You may call me an Apocaloptimist, but I’m not the only one!

I do see, as Shakespeare said, “Though this be madness, there is a method to it.” And I don’t think we have to like it. I can’t say I’m liking it all the time, but we do have to understand it and work with what is, rather than lamenting on the wrongness of it all. It seems that everyone can agree that many things are quite challenging so far in 2020, and everyone seems to have someone or something to blame. But on a planetary level, where we were heading wasn’t in the best interest for all of humanity and blaming never helped anyone. Rather, it’s time to feel empowered by the opportunity and to trust Divine guidance to get us through our fears of what will be. Key word: “through.”  

Let’s be open to possibility that if you are reading this, you are more ready than ever to work on those deeper layers and that you are desiring to be better prepared for these and upcoming challenges… and inspiring others as well!


As humans with built-in empathy and acute sensitivities, you know experientially that the idiom, “There’s only love and light” is incomplete because you can feel much more than just love and light pretty much everywhere. And when observed objectively, “There’s only love and light” can also mean, “I don’t want to deal with my shadow.”

But we’ve all got a shadow, and the sooner we own up to it and work with it, the closer we are to true freedom.

What we witness with acceptance can’t control us any longer. What we own, can’t own us. It’s time to step onto the next rung of our personal – and collective – evolution beyond the mentalizing and spiritual bypassing we’ve been taught by well-meaning persons. Partly perhaps, because it seems easier, and to some, more loving. I propose that if most of our blockages and challenges are emotional at their origin, then emotional work (in addition to all you’ve done so far to get here!) is a lot more loving than repressing or denying or mentalizing all of our many facets. And when done with consistency and patience, can set us truly free.

And isn’t that what we all want anyway?   


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About Dave Markowitz

Dave Markowitz is a two-time best-selling author, intuitive healing facilitator and guide for Empaths and Highly Sensitive Persons. His work has been endorsed by Shirley MacLaine, Lynn Andrews, Lee Harris, Dannion and Kathryn Brinkley, Karen McPhee, Dr. Meg Blackburn Losey and more. He’s shared the lecture bill with Deepak Chopra and Gary Null and has worked with thousands of empaths and highly sensitive persons (HSPs) since his “empathic awakening” in 2012. To find out more about Dave, check out

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